woman with flower

as an antique flower enthusiast (i only own one) this poem seemed to speak far above the planting she seemed to be describing. i LOVE great imagery..and fabulously used metaphors. job well done poet. i hope to be this good with words someday.


Woman With Flower


By Naomi Long Madgett



I wouldn't coax the plant if I were you.

Such watchful nurturing may do it harm.

Let the soil rest from so much digging

And wait until it's dry before you water it.

The leaf's inclined to find its own direction;

Give it a chance to seek the sunlight for itself.

Much growth is stunted by too careful prodding,

Too eager tenderness.

The things we love we have to learn to leave alone.

He is not idle...

the year is winding down...maybe everything on your year's "to do" list didn't get down but praise God that each day is actually a new day. we sow and we reap. we sow and we reap. and we live another day to do it again. be encouraged by this simple yet powerful verse. dream on dreamers.



Psalm 126:5 
"Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy"

dream on dreamer.

do you know joseph? you might see him in yourself. here's a little background. joseph was the 11th son of jacob and rachel. jacob favored joseph and eventually gave joesph a coat of many colors. this favoritism caused joseph's brothers to envy him greatly.

but the point of all this begins at Genesis 37:1-11 when joseph shares with his brothers two dreams that he had: (1) joseph and his brothers gathered bundles of grain. then, all the grain bundles that had been prepared by the brothers gathered around joseph's bundle and bowed down to it. (2) the sun (father), the the moon (mother) and eleven stars (brothers) bowed down to joseph himself.

these dreams really didn't sit well with the brothers considering the implication that the family would be bowing down to him. even more so, jacob took serious thought to what joseph was saying, and this mad the brothers even more upset!

---------

i think of joesph's story whenever the word VISION crosses my mind. i know im a big dreamer. i accomplish one goal and im already onto the next one that very moment, but as of recently, everything..including vision has seemed overwhelming. everything's moving much faster than i can keep up with.

and joesph's story (which you can read in its entirety from Genesis 37-50) is a constant reminder that dreaming that is ultimately vision will come with alot of combat. if you continue to read his story, he runs into plenty of obstacles. i once read that a dream is an empty vision and vision is a dream taking action. according to scripture, i cannot say that i now believe this to be true. i believe God sets us up for vision to just be revealed even without our help...the key to vision is not always about keeping it in front of you but persevering through the obstacles. i don't recall in his story where joesph spoke blatantly about the steps he was going to take to reach those dreams. he just KNEW what God put in him (another key is knowing God breathed it). he had no idea how they would become true, but he knew that it was God's vision.

take this from joesph...every obstacle is a step. when God puts it (whatever your it is) in you, he doesn't NEED help to make those visions real. all he needs is you to operate as a vessel and in order to do so, you must press through the struggles that make you want to step back and quit. with God, all things are possible. without Him, nothing is worth chasing. don't quit. He needs you to do what He's sent you to do.

dream on dreamers.

Black Butterfly.

long time.

i was sharing tunes with my mama.
and every song seems like somethiing ive lived before.
but this one song...mama says, "oh i remember this song..."
and proceeds to share a story about when she was driving over a bridge when
this deniece williams classic came on the radio. i wasnt yet born.
she said it "changed her life". and could i believe that music can "change your life"?
of course i do. i was really encouraged by that.
it almost instantly felt this song was also...my song...

this short rant was simply to say...whats your song? what encourages you?
i started running through my mind all the countless times i stayed up
as a teenager at late and early hours just listening to music...
alot of it...changed my life, encouraged my artistry and shaped who i am.
and im thinking, "my God. what is it that my children will be encouraged by?"
of course, Christ. but music that can truly stick with you...is that even alive for the youngsters anymore?

idk...it just ran through my mind...how different things were from what they are now.
i sometimes wish...we had those classic hits that came before me in our generation. this particular song didnt even release until 1984. i wasnt born until 1986.

i guess im just old school.. but i just wanted to share that.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

if you are interested...

Houston's African American Museum and Culture Center is hosting a symposium THIS weekend titled: Africans in America-The New Beat of Afropolitans! I highly encourage you to check it out and support these events. I have attached the link here: http://www.hmaac.org/afropolitan_schedule.html

loss of innocence

the loss of innocence

i simply have been revoked innocence
it's as if it doesnt even EXIST anymore
that simplicity is no longer equitable to me...or you
& accepting that fact might be the hardest thing to do

i heard when you've taken away almost everything somebody knows
they become a different person - strictly in survival mode
they just have the need to survive and the will to live
..& thats when everything that brought comfort & innocence was taken away
Innocence doesn’t live in them anymore…

sometimes i wish i could go back there...
like, you think a few years ago when your mind couldnt wrap around
some of the things that now your mind cant help but wonder about...
remember when lisa frank stickers was your biggest argument?
& not about issues with the bank over your credit card bill?
Remember when playing in a loose field meant trying to find a four leaf clover to play,
“He loovveesss me, he loves me not…”

& the world doesnt allow room for simplicity anymore
everything is over the TOP
nothing of VALUE is valued
someone has to GIVE but no one EVER does
people who were once "friends" become strangers...
...& you're not even interested in them anymore...
its ALWAYS about u & never about US
how can i help you? What do you need?
I mean, what ever happened to community?
just the DESIRE to care for someone and never expecting anything in return…
can we just to be a brother or sister's keeper...??

i just miss the innocence & i mourn its loss....
that one day...
my children (and yours) are going to come into the world where "happiness" equals wealth
over-stimulated by reality tv, sex, lust and money
& Hell becomes an unreal place that it's synonymous to "Heaven" on Earth
i fear for the world & its people...

so i wear my black veil in silence
see, i see people i thought i knew and pray for them...
with wisdom comes a state of misery that nothing that once was makes SENSE nemore
I more you, innocence
if no one misses you - at least i do
cause id give back all the flesh & contents i own..
to rekindle what God wanted us to NEVER take forgranted...

FAST REPORT: im stepping out.

in case you're still counting: it's DAY 26 with 4 days to go. it just jetted by, right? wow.

well, im coming full circle in this social networking fast. the commercial i saw that brought this all on came on as i was dosing off to sleep and im really glad i was motivated to it. although i havent read A Call to Die in a few days and not nearly as close to be done as i'd like to...it's a book of lessons AND ive added another book to my reading list as soon as im done with this one called: Jesus Withouth Religion. I'm excited to read it.

anyways. the past month we've been teaching the kids about: humility. definately a lesson for me as much as its been for them. A Call to Die is about: humility. my life in the last month has been about: humility. i just needed to really drill that lesson in my mind about putting things of priority...FIRST! it came to me that the thing that i should be putting first most of all is TIME. time is so available but limited and essential yet freeing. and everything about what im motivated to do is contingent in God's timing...not my own...

ive been on so many time contraints in the last month that ive just asked God to give me some wiggle room and all i can really hear from Him is that i need to allow that extra 15-30 minutes i waste doing the miscelleanous to stay focused on the agenda He has laid out. a leap of faith. a moment to step out of the ordinary to be in unordinary spaces and be welcomed by them...

i realized that first hand today as i stepped into a room of women i did not know and pitched several of them my goals and vision. scary and out of the ordinary but so welcoming. it was out of my comfort zone, but i didnt know that stepping out of my comfort zone would be so comforting.

i praise God for this short season to fully fellowship with Him out of distractions, but im looking forward to what lies ahead and whatever these  next days of the fast have in store. i have a few days until my move and a few days until i confirm that i have the next job im hoping for. please pray, Saints!

FAST REPORT: casting the net.

on day 2 of my social networking fast. didn't think it would be this difficult. im not even allowed to go to the site to peep around..nope! deleted the apps from my phone and it's definately not easy. i almost feel...pathetic. i was thinking when i woke up, "what a great revelation i just had. i should share it on twitter." out of the question! and then my mind started thinking...what did you do before you started this social networking nonsense? WRITING! i was an active journal/diary writer, and since the fast started, i've had at leats one entry a day in my journal and posted here so im on a roll! it's not like i can do anything else...

but the fast was much needed. it came to me that between the social sites/apps i visit, almost daily, i've totally neglicted my need to read and devote more time to quiet time. spending that 10-15 minutes just browsing those sites left little time to just be still...in my God space and totally disconnected. so im going to try and stay as committed as i can to this and not find something other than my purposed resources to fill those spaces.

in the meantime, didnt know God was going to start working so soon...three things struck me this weekend to become my week's focus. nothing that i had planned to find something in...it just came to me.

(1) the movie Limitless
(2) Day 12 "Death...and your good clothes" of the Book A Call to Die
(3) Pastor's sermon today "Go Fish"

Not gonna lie, Limitless was a good movie! At the end of the movie, I really couldn't grasp if I should be learning something from this movie or whether it was just a display for pure entertainment and nothing to really take from it. If you haven't seen it, I'm definately going to spoil it a little bit, but I'm concerned whether this movie gives a false since of security that a certain staus is equivalent to happiness. That money and power can solve all of your problems. What in fact happened is the people who took the pill totally became different type of people. It reminded me of someone who had a few drinks. That might be totally mellow otherwise, and a few drinks turns them into a different type of person. They become addicted to that person they are when they drink that having fun without the drink is almost impossible. It isn't reality, and it's just a cover up. I thought at the end of the movie...did he kill the old person he was in order to have this person? It made me wonder how do I value success? How do I define my happiness? Saturday, I was riding down Richmond. Windows down, music going and I'm genuinely happy. I have no worries, and I regret nothing. I have no envy for what others have because I'm aware that if God wanted me to have it, I'd have it. I may not make 100k, but my life FEELS LIKE I make 100k. It's worth more to me to have that joy. Even more so, that joy attracts great things that are for you to happen in your favor. So why need a miracle pill for something God's already lined up for you? Good movie though. Plus, I hate pharmaceutical drugs, so I'd pass anyway!

Sadly, I'm still working on the book A Call to Die. A 40 day read, and I'm three months in. Really sad, but I do plan to finish it this time. Day 12 focused on Colossians 3:5,9-10. It seemed to reiterate the reason I decided to do this version of my fast. Kill the earthly nature in order to indulge in "renewed knowledge in the image of its Creator". This book has really been challenging me to be a more mindful thinker. To be aware that growing is a different process at different staging in our lives. My growth process now is different than 2-3 years ago so when I read that Scripture saying find "renewed knowledge"...I was confused at first. Now, I'm aware that one lesson observed in the Bible maybe a few years ago is totally different to my life now. In fact, the way I react to understanding the purpose is different. I'm consistently grateful to the revelations of this book. It's not an easy read though especially because it's all about bringing awareness to where you need to develop better. But how fun would life be if it was always comfortable anyway?

Pastor started a sermon series today. I wasn't even going to go to service today, but I was reeled in by my conscious/Holy Spirit ...however you would like to call it. His lesson came from a familiar Scripture in Luke 5..or is it 6? One of them it is when Jesus was with Simon (Peter) when he went fishing to cast his net off the boat. The sermon really solidified my confirmation that my social networking fast was not only necessary but in alignment to take my networking to a different level not only with God but with people. Pastor continued to reiterate that Simon didn't understand the purpose why Jesus requested him to cast his net again even though he'd been fishing all day and didn't catch anything! I totally understand Peter's perspective. Sometimes the purpose of something that God places on our heart isn't always going to be in full vision at that moment. Is that what faith is for? It takes the place of fear. Wow, irony that we've been teaching the kids all month about having courage.

So it seems like every year is becoming a new lesson about allowing your senses to be awakened in a different way. In the movie, his senses were opened in a pill. In Scripture, Simon's senses were awakened after Jesus showed his committment to Simon even though he was doubtful of Him. It's all about being awakened and not losing yourself in order to superficially fit into a mold that doesn't (1) bring joy (2) reconcile your place with God. Casting out our nets to totally find exactly what we need in order to get everything we want. Taking the chance on trusting God on His many promises and making ourselves step out of the norm in order to fulfill those needs. In the end, without the two, it's impossible to totally be free. Freedom is in death of self.

if i were a boy...

i hope everyone have a great christmas! i had a great day, and i kind of wish christmas had ended up thursday so i could have that extended weekend before i have to go back to work. but it's cool. but i was driving home from my mom's and i was thinking about, 'wow, if i were married, i wonder what would be going through my husband's mind at this time? would he be stressed out about the christmas thing? spending and all that?' and im not sure what drove me to the thought...

but it made me think...wow, i cant even imagine what its like to be a man...the minute he comes into the world he will carry it. and without proper guidance, it will be so hard for him to know how to handle the authority and power he's been given. just thinking about all the things that a man has to handle...hisself and then his family and everybody is expecting him to be everything. some men just cant handle that. they leave their kids. they leave their lives and they become like children just wanting to be but then the men whom actually chose to carry their cross and must walk through the public square and be subject to ridicule, praise, honor & dishonor...i just cant imagine the burden he carries...

& it brought to mind Mary's (Jesus's mother) husband Joseph. I mean, what was he supposed to do knowing that a man was being born from his wife whom he did not impregnate? A man who would come from his wife and be the man to change the world as he knows it? The Bible doesn't talk much about Joesph though...

but i never feel like they get enough credit. im sure Joseph had to get his ego in check to handle what was about the happen in his life. and i can only imagine the only countless men that ive known who have had to swallow their pride to humble themselves to be leader and follower simutaneously. and i have yet to believe that i will ever understand what it's like to be a man but unlike the "if i were a boy" song...i have great faith that ALL men have the best things to offer. in fact, God has ordained them to be our fathers, friends and leaders. and we should have no problem uplifting them when they EXCEED our expectations because they chose to stand in their authority. the issue is often our expectations are low and our brothers are running on low energy...

i read a quote from @MonicaMyLife via Twitter that said: To all my fellas so much is expected of you, but don't hesitate to reach out for help from those u love. Being 2 strong or 2hard will break u


i TOTALLY agree! sometimes we are quick to speak, quick to request and simply do not listen to them. you know...when Jesus got tired one time He sat at the well and asked the Samaritan woman if she could draw Him water. He told her things that other people did not know and she went back to tell others the Good News. i do not equate our brothas to Christ but the situation is similar. The men in our lives ask for a little when they know we demand alot and already know what we want and need. He is simply trying to get some wiggle run to become a priority on your list as much as you're a priority on his.
 
so the next time you're listening to that Beyonce track..don't forget their are countless, faceless and nameless men whom are working overtime on our behalf, on the behalf of our communities and their families. and aren't we glad that they still exist?

 
i'm praying & interceeding for all of you =)

makeup minimalism

i recently published an article with AC discussing some key points about make ups that can really be natural make unders! here's some items and tips that i'd like to share!

article:
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/6050214/makeup_minimalism_pg2.html?cat=69

1. my faaaavvooorriiittteee mascara is MAYBELLINE Falsies Volume Express. i have no idea how i've gone my whole life with this mascara. i was previously using Covergirl's Lash Blast and was NOT impressed by the results. this mascara (Falsies) has just been the biggest increase to my look. without all the other things, this mascara is more than enough to update a look. you also do not need to apply alot in order to get a great appearance. i've included some application tips in the article.



2. LIP GLOSS -- a a huge love for Carmax. it's a great moisturizer for the lips but there's also great lip glosses that add these values also. my favorites tend to always come from Victoria Secret. I'm also a huge fan of Mary Kay nourishine gloss. After getting it as a gift for my bday last year, i've been hooked! I'm wearing at Carmax, VS Denimmania Sweatjeans gloss and the Marykay nourishine in this photo.




3. BLUSH! I don't have a product favorite. Right now...I'm doing a soft red lipstick to create a soft blush that works for my skin tone. For a dark skinned woman, I thought anything like blush and red lipstick would be ridiculous, but it's been the opposite. I've enjoyed playing with it. This webpage is quick, easy and helpful: http://www.easymakeuptutorial.com/blush-makeup-tutorial/

 



If nothing else, makeup doesn't have to make you look like a clown. Subtle enhancements are just as good as looking like a MAC make up applicator. Keep it simple for your busy and hectic days and add a little to dress up your evening.

my summer in a nutshell

so the summer is surely closing. labor day is looming.
do you have big plans? i never do!
had a blessed summer of personal growth & relaxation.
im thinking that's what summer's are really for.
reflection. growth. stability.
ive really enjoyed that balance this summer & praise God for the break!
where will i go next? not sure but im in planning season.
here's my summer in 20 photos. thanks for reading =)

i pee in the shower.

la-de-dah is the day! it was smooth sailing & i actually enjoyed it. but in the midst of some boredom at work i was reading an article, as i often am, about why women should not be mad at men when they pee on the floor or better yet just had really lousy aim. long story short...there's apparently plenty of reasons why a sane man would not make the toilet. *shrugs* but imagine how disgusting we women feel about things like that. he's disgusting, right? he probably didnt even car eenough to clean it up. whatever. but i started thinking about today how women tend to be so "nice-nasty" that they fail to live.

granted. i agree that that ish is nasty and he probably needs get his own bathroom and pee properly but how is it that modern women are still so ancient (or should i say antique elegance) in what we choose to hide about ourselves?

what i've discovered through relationships with men is that they want women to be as free as they are...to an extent. please, dont go trying to pee with your husband or "boo" in the corner somewhere. you'll probably make a seirous mess, but i would definately encourage women to be more human in embracing what is natural in the process of loving someone which is breaking the shields and opening the veils. although your elegance is important in allowing you to sustain confidence and have your mate view you as a lady. it's equally essential to able to identify what kind of woman you REALLY are outside the public view. can you connect with yourself? not necessarily in THAT way if you got your mind in the gutter! but think of it in aspects of being more like a paper clip...it's moldable. you should, to an extent, always be moldable with your mate. the only thing consistent in ANYTHING is change. but to lay the foundation to what you are makes him appreciate you more..the airy-ness...the open-ness...

so what does this have to do with me peeing in the shower ? *shrugs* it's simply a confession. however, imagine what a confession such as this...out loud...could do to your self esteem? or maybe you can admit out loud..as i do...that sleeping with clothes should be sin *shrugs* it identifies what kind of person you REALLY are and encourages you to act on the expression.

here's what the process looks like to me:
1. make an admission
2. come to grips with that admission and say it aloud
3. explore why you feel that way (why did i need to say that?)
4. how can i make this work for my good?

admitting that i pee in the shower could...for the love of God draw someone toward God! crazy, right? but maybe they can find humanity in me even though im a spiritual person. they dont feel like im non-approachable. it also allows me to be open. to be admit that aloud and begin to accept other things about myself and may appear shameful to others. i've chosen to embrace the little flaws and/or awkward things about myself that allow me to be me.

how do this play out in relationship? well, you're more open with your partner. if your dude is running to some hussy that's totally different from you...and not that he NEVER has a right to cheat on you...EVER and it's NEVER your fault...after you break up with him and burn his clothes...discover those aspects of yourself that you can be more cautious about opening and closing.

i believe that someone are SO comfortable in their skin and they easily get taken advantaged of and become a revolving door with relationships. no one in Heaven is that considered healthy but making small admissions about what's wierd...awesome...strange etc about you will make you more open in several areas of your life.

& these words come from a closer hoarder of emotions *raises hand*

Prettiest Day in New Orleans

courtesy of solcomhouse.com

Prettiest Day in New Orleans


I can’t believe it’s been five years already. Moving to New Orleans was me embarking on a new journey. New Orleans was the perfect city. First week through classes, enjoying the new experiences and first weekend out on Bourbon street, I was ready for August 29,2005. It was a Monday. If I recall correctly, I remember briefly hearing about a hurricane coming on that Sunday. My mom had mentioned it to me, but no one I knew on campus or heard about was taking the storm that seriously. A hurricane? Oh whatever! Besides, it would more than likely be something simple over the weekend and we’d be back to work. The weather had been pleasing the previous week and the weekend. Monday morning I looked out the window before getting ready for class, and my mom calls me. Apparently, the hurricane was more serious than expected. I realized people were leaving, but I still wanted to stay. I wasn’t convinced yet, but my mom had my uncle, from Biloxi/Ocean Springs, to pick me up. I sat on the stoop in front of KD. There weren’t any clouds in the sky. The humidity felt rather low that morning, and the birds were singing. In the midst of the people congregating on the lawn, the chaos and mayhem, the nature around us was still and beautiful. So, I took a stroll toward the library and sat near the shaded tree in the breezeway facing the nun’s quarters I think. It just didn’t seem like a hurricane was due to arrive. When my uncle came and we sat through several hours of traffic, people were frantic. Needless to say, the next time I’d return to New Orleans would be in January when the city was open to residents again. The week of Katrina, I resided in Mississippi. The storm came in with full force, it whistled through the night and day until it finally died down. It was a stillness for a minute before the sounds of sirens surrounded us. I hadn’t slept since the storm came in. We had no electricity, access to phones, food, water but the church up the street offered us meals. The only way I could get home was through Alabama…the long way back to Houston because of the apparent damage. I had no idea what was going on until my uncle told me, “Your school is flooded.” So, the prettiest day in New Orleans was a hoax? I felt bamboozled by nature. To allow us to have the most perfect day, it set us up for the perfect storm. Katrina was historic in nature and brutal in its forces. Seeing the gulf of Mississippi, the places we used to go, the places we used to stay, the beach homes along the front...they are no more. The vitality of New Orleans is just not the same. The energy is different. The aspects of history from both of these states I've spent a great time growing to love had changed. But is the change necessarily bad? No. It was just different. I went back to Houston went three pairs of clothes and school books. Everything about what happened with Katrina is officially a blur, but I’ll never forget the day of. It’s just a continuous reminder for me that its in the silence, the quiet, the perfection in something that rises up the spirit in you to say, “God must have something to say.” Oh, He had plenty to say and plenty to expose. There’s still a long way to go. It'll be like 9/11 for those of us who went through Katrina, but I refuse to remember it as a sad story. It initiated new desires within me for that I'm grateful. I definately reverance any pretty days in Houston from now on. This time...I'm listening,.

when i saw a ballerina dance...

photo courtesy of LA Times

im always in random awe at what love is capable of doing in people. and i dont mean romantic love i mean love..passion...for a something other than another person. like an art form, a cause or a mission. people who stand up for something simply out of love is an OVERWHELMING expression to me.

while visiting nyc a little while ago...i HAD to be at Alvin Ailey. after a semester of studying dance, visiting modern dance studios and actually having the opportunity to perform...i saw a new appreciation for what it is they do.

so while in nyc, i took a dance class which was...AH-mazing. so much fun. great class. kewl ass students i met and some waayyy more trained than me but the instructor was so in tune with us that the energy in there was crazy. like...nothing i ever experienced before. live drummers...all the movement and the sounds just suck you in. the hour just went by too fast. but while waiting for James to come...i got to see the REAL dancers dance.

do we ALL like to dance? duh. but the technicality of some of these people's work is outrageous. i saw REAL ballerinas and well trained modern dancers GLIDE across the floor. the fluidity of their bodies and damn...their bodies were AH-MAZING...i was just in awe struck. nothing like if i would have met a celebrity and although i was just sitting outside the room...i felt like i was sitting right in front of their rehearsal.

it made me sad & excited. sad because i was just an amateur. ugh, so far to go if i ever want to be like that. and then excited to just have shared the space. the energy they had was encouraging that when you chase after you're passions...you can glide across floors too. it's not like this came overnight for them. it took alot of hard work and Alvin Ailey isnt a run of the meal studio.

& seeing them work in such an intense and passionate way just showed so much LOVE that was there. love that they chased after and that as long as God had given them feet...there wasnt a soul that could take that kind of love away from them. isnt that was LOVE is all about? the passion? the essence of raw feelings that translate from the mind and into the limelight...or in their case...the dance floor? that's real, man and i was just so excited to know that this kind of love in its raw form can still blossom.

i figure this is the greatest lesson Alvin Ailey's class taught me: just be. feel it. embrace it. chase it. find the passion and take in the love.

tks <3

play naked.

just do it. it's necessary. hope you're having a GREAT saturday =)