Thursday, August 12, 2010

did FANTASIA bail out?

whew! so much drama surrounding ms. barrino right now! allegedly she tried to committ suicide and was admitted to the hospital. scary right? all of this after finding out her man's WIFE named her in a legal document regarding their separation...divorce...whatever it is. Fanny, i got a message for you..and maybe for yall too! read on...

one tweet i read on a monday morning from kirk franklin said: "i realized i love God but i dont always trust Him..." but i paraphrase him when he went on to say that trusting is a choice and it's a learned behavior.... i realize we're not meant to trust any and everything. furthermore, it's harder to trust someone who's tangible but not really tangible enough. then you get in the "complicated" phase (please see other blog on this topic) but you just have to lend your ear and heart and mind to God in order to know you're in the right direction. ahh...easy to say, i know!

i dont always trust God. lately, i've found myself barely trusting Him at all despite the fact that i've received confirmation about some things i've prayed about...alot of other things really haven't been confirmed for me. or have they? i'm always feeling like im...WAITING...which brings my waiting to year 23 and a half! but sometime when we feel like we've waiting TOO LONG...we get in a rush mode. "oh, i need this. im tired of waiting." or how about "man, ima just needa do this myself!" sound like you? well, it DOES sound like me and i think it's honest for believers to admit that we don't always trust God. we looking for a BAIL OUT.
on my way to work, i speed sometimes. speeding to get to the next place and wanting everybody to get out of my way. my sisters, friends etc always tell me that i drive too slow...idk if im attempting to prove a point to myself that i could get anywhere in record time without having any issues or what but after returning from fiesta texas and pulling up to our over night stay...i got pulled over.

the officer told me i didnt stop at the red light..."your tires never stopped didn't come to a complete stop..." he said to me. "you have to come to a complete stop ma'am. that's what the sign is there for." and i simply replied w/ a "i complete understand" but after he gave me a warning and let me go on my way..i didn't understand the importance of what he had be honest..i hadnt even realized that a stop sign was there. i never saw the sign & i wasnt paying attention at all. i just went on my way.

& when my sister & i was mumbling about it later that night she said, "he chose to stop u right in front of the crib because of a stop sign? none of the other cops thought to stop you when you were running out of the lines on the highway on our way here. nobody stopped you when you were speeding. a freakin' stop sign?"

& im thinking to myself: yeah, that was pretty stupid. but Lord, im wondering if it's just a metaphor for what myself is requesting right now...a stop sign. i've been running out of the lines a little bit and telling any and everybody in my way to GET OUT OF MY WAY and right now...i just need a stop sign...take it ez and enjoy the ride. be mindful of the signs & know the right directions to take. GOOD directions will never lead you into the wrong way...

& my mind is finally wrapping around the LONG-SUFFERING game. 1 of the many fruits of the spirit is PATIENCE and surely we take the virtue for granted but look at all the things God has offered His people that waitied. Remember Ruth when she waited? Remember what happened to Abraham when he DID NOT wait? Remember the woman with the issue of blood who traveled with patience many miles and saved money JUST to go see Jesus..and only just the hem of His garment?

my opinion:
Fanny was blinded by what she thought was love and forgot God in the process. there is a process in all these God sends us through, but we sometimes block it out with our BAIL OUT. and with that being said, we end up on rollercoasters we're not mature enough to ride...spiritually. we end in situation that combat God's favor in turn for what favor the enemy within us promises. she.forgot.patience.prayer.peace. and with those things will bring about revelation that this wasnt an approrpiate and wise decision to make. i pray that she does not become overwhelm by this to the state that she doesn't allow God to lead her out. when we are lost the Word says, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18 and how awesome is this, "My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life!" so dear Fanny, reserve patience in your heart.

my God. how can we NOT wait? although THE flesh isnt interested in anything that puts "long" & "suffering" together just remember this: Fantasia is just an open example of a private problem we all have.
lessons still to learn, friends.